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By Lia London

The Slumpy Life of Copernica Fletcher

 Contemporary / 527 views / Popular

Breaking even. That’s not too much to ask, is it?

Fourteen years, six months and three days ago, I was born. That much I got right, but a few minutes later, my life took a sharp turn for the slumpy when my space-loving, geeky father named me Copernica Galilea Fletcher. Yeah. For reals.

I have a single, solitary, precious goal for the year (besides maintaining straight A’s), and that is to balance the ups and downs of life. Because if high school is as bad as middle school was, I’ll slump so low, I’ll turn into Odor Eaters in the bottom of my sneakers.

Oh, and as a related sub goal, avoid Kenny Chan at all costs.

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